Here’s something about being a mom that nobody warns you about, the way your own needs quietly slip to the bottom of the list. You spend your days holding everyone else together, keeping meals on the table, managing schedules, solving problems, and carrying everyone else’s emotional load. Over time, you forget that your own soul needs care too.

Many moms don’t even realize how depleted they are until they feel it in their bones, the exhaustion, the overwhelm, the feeling of losing yourself. But the truth is, you can’t pour from an empty cup. Learning to take care of yourself isn’t indulgent or selfish, it’s what keeps you strong enough to show up for everyone you love.

Self care doesn’t have to mean extravagant spa days or expensive vacations. It starts with quiet moments, pausing to breathe, drinking your morning coffee before it goes cold, allowing yourself permission to say no. These small choices become the love notes you write to yourself, little reminders that you matter too.

For many women, motherhood becomes an identity so all encompassing that we forget who we were before, the writer, the reader, the dreamer, the friend. Those parts of you still exist, waiting for you to notice them again. Maybe it’s time to pick up that old hobby you left behind. Maybe it’s time to let yourself rest without guilt.

I was reminded of the importance of these love notes recently when I came across Janna Miller’s touching novel, The Golden Hour. Through her heartfelt storytelling, Janna explores how easily we can lose ourselves when life becomes heavy, and how critical it is to find our way back. Her story is a beautiful reminder that self care isn’t just about surviving, it’s about finding joy, even in the mess of life.

You might feel like you have to be the strong one, the dependable one, the one who never falters. But you are human, and it’s okay to let your guard down. It’s okay to admit that you’re tired. It’s okay to ask for help. In fact, showing your children that you value yourself enough to rest and recharge teaches them an important lesson about self worth.

Self care can be as simple as taking a walk around the block, just you and your thoughts. It can be taking a longer shower while someone else tends to the kids. It can be letting the laundry wait while you finish a book or sit outside and watch the sunset. You deserve those moments.

One powerful practice is learning to listen to your own inner voice, the one that whispers what you truly need. Too often, that voice is drowned out by the noise of everything else, but if you quiet the world around you, you’ll hear it. Maybe it’s telling you to slow down. Maybe it’s asking you to dream again. Maybe it’s reminding you that you are more than the sum of your responsibilities.

In The Golden Hour, Janna Miller shows us that we all carry invisible battles, and even when life doesn’t go as planned, hope and healing are possible. Her book inspired me to start writing my own little golden hour into each day, time set aside just for me, no matter how small. It might be journaling, listening to music, or just sitting still in silence.

If you’re reading this and thinking, “That sounds nice, but I just don’t have time,” remember this, you don’t have to find hours. Start with five minutes. Breathe deeply. Let yourself feel. Take stock of what you need. Write a note to yourself if you have to, You are allowed to rest. You are worthy of care. You are more than enough.

So tonight, after the kids are tucked in and the house quiets down, pour yourself a cup of tea. Light a candle. Open that book you’ve been meaning to read, or simply close your eyes and let yourself just be. These small moments add up. They remind you of your own strength and beauty.

Motherhood asks so much of you, but you can’t forget, you matter too. Write those love notes to yourself every day, in whatever way you can. You’ll be surprised how much lighter the load feels when you take the time to nourish your own heart.

And if you need a little inspiration to get started, pick up a copy of Janna Miller’s The Golden Hour. Her words are a gentle nudge to slow down, to see the beauty in your story, and to remember that your own golden hour is waiting, if only you’ll take it.